A Different China (I)

After the wonderful wedding on Tuesday, we said good-bye to the Chinese family of our “new” daughter-in-law. Now there are four of us travelling China (the newly-weds, Barbara and yours truly). Today is Friday, we are staying at the Hangzhou Sheraton Wetland Park Resort – which, incidentally, is an excellent hotel – and I feel a little like I am starring in an American Road Movie. Except that it is played out in China. But what I see might just as well be happening in the USA.

If only there were not a few specialties that do not at all fit into the “American-European Culture”. Let me just write some unstructured and, hopefully, non-judgmental comments:

Our Hotel Howard Johnson at Wuhan

It is not just the gas masks you find in every hotel. More often than not, I feel like in Israel. Except that I have no idea what enemy might be capable of threatening this huge and powerful China. It cannot be Japan, even if, currently, this neighbour is not very much appreciated.

The speed with which they celebrate and also live in general seems to be a little faster in China than in our cultural circle. For example, even at our wedding, the rather elaborate installation was de-installed immediately after the ceremony.

The wonderful wedding meal, too, was eaten at surprising speed. I am almost tempted to say it was gulped down. Mind you, the ceremony was very intense and impressive.

For a Bavarian wedding, you could never imagine it being over after such a short time.
Work is highly dynamic. As I perceive it, EVERYTHING here happens at a racy speed. Finishing quickly is all that counts.

I often ask myself if the same is true for sex in this country? The people work long and hard. Often they have two jobs. To be sure, everything is not (yet) quite as efficient as at home, but most of the Chinese who helped us on our trip have a remarkable ability to imagine what we might need. This is totally different from what I am used to, for instance, from Southern Europe or Africa.

And wherever you go, there is always a little “Bollywood” – although we all know this did not originate in China. In every show, every event, every hotel, every museum. The enterprises, too, celebrate their events for increasing their employees’ motivation very “emotionally”. You always get a great “Show”.

The sound of a monumental hymn is not restricted to after you went somewhere by ship. Federal authorities and police are so omnipresent, you might feel tempted to call them “operetta-like”. But with monumental theatre. For me, it is always quite impressive how their constant presence in many cities is apparent. After all, the vehicles are always different and often surprisingly dissimilar.

But there are other exciting differences, as well. For example with the toilets. In Chinese English, they are always called “washroom”.  In the top hotels, you will not notice any difference between China and Europe.

In general, you often come across a “Pit-Latrine” in China. Well, I am fine with this. It might perhaps make it necessary for us to practice a little more physical discipline than our “sit-down toilet”. But – thank you very much – I can still manage.

The story gets interesting with the urinal. There is always plenty of wetness in front of those. Mostly you actually find quite a puddle. Even the written recommendation you often find to, please, for reasons of hygiene, come closer to the urinal, does not really help.

Basically, you only have two options: either you piss from afar, or else you do a very broad splits. Otherwise you will end up with disagreeably wet feet.

🙂 I decided in favour of the second option. …

Incidentally, you will find ashtrays on all toilets, even though smoking is prohibited at many places. This is also true for many toilets. Except that nobody cares! But I will tell the story of prohibitions and how they affect life in my next article. Along with other “specialties”.

RMD
(Translated by EG)

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